I love being a wife, a mother, and a teacher. But, sometimes I feel like I have lost myself in the roles I play. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I see Mrs. Fulton grading papers, or Angie cooking dinner, or Mommy making bottles. But…I don’t see me.
Sometimes I miss my old life. Being able to do what I want, when I want, without having to think about anyone else’s needs or feelings. I miss that freedom. Now I have a husband that I spend all of my free time with. And I can’t go anywhere without taking little man or getting a sitter. My carefree life is over.
I thought this was what I wanted…and it is…but sometimes I just need a break from it. I need to be able to have a brief moment of spontaneity. Sometimes I need to do something that is completely selfish and self-serving.
Before, everything was enough. I felt completely satisfied with my life. But then…and now…well…he…and…it’s like the Matrix. I took the red pill. My eyes are opened. I can never go back.