Who’s Really Winning?


This is a rant.

After scrolling through Instagram while waiting for ‘Empire’ to come on, I couldn’t help but notice the plethora of posts about women sharing men.  For example, Fetty Wapp is dating Alexis Sky, however, he just had a baby with Masika Kalysha.  Amina Buddafly is posting pictures of her growing baby bump with Peter Gunz, although he just fathered his third child with Tara Wallace not even a couple of months ago.  I actually tried to get an accurate count of how many children Peter Gunz has now (but that’s for another post).  Kim K is posting more naked selfies.  Scroll.  Scroll.  Chris Brown is clapping back at people old enough to be his mother *sigh* (his lack of respect for women could be an entire different post rant!).  I mean, honestly, when the relationship between T.I. and Tiny becomes #relationshipgoals, that’s kind of scary, but true.  Unless he has some illegitimate children somewhere that no one knows about, T.I. is one of the few men (besides Stephen Curry and Lebron James) that give me hope that not all celebrity men cheat.

But, I digress…because…this is a rant.

A rant at the ridiculousness that has become relationships in America.  A rant at the fact that men continuously cheat on women and jump back and forth between women….and the fact that women don’t mind.  In fact, they exploit it.  They argue a.k.a. “clapback” at each other on social media, posting pictures like…”he’s with me,” “I bet she’s wondering where her man is at,” “she don’t even know,” etc.   At the fact that women argue with each other but never hold the man accountable.  Or, if they do, they forgive him and let him crawl back into their beds (congratulations Columbus Short).

And I’m not ranting because of the situation.  Let’s be real.  This has been happening since the beginning of time.  I’m ranting because now women are fighting over useless men that weren’t worth the sperm and egg it took to create them.  Men that are downright ugly inside and out.  Men that rather live off of women than to make an honest day’s wage to support their families.  Men that call trash bags suitcases and that could fit everything they own in a Nike duffle.  Men that’s only purpose in life is to procreate and bring women down.

“He pays his part,” said Amina Buddafly on the ‘Love & Hip Hop Reunion Show Part 2.’  What does that mean exactly?  He pays his part?  He’s cheating on you.  Playing you out on national television.  Having babies with other women.  Impregnating you and them at the same time.  But, he pays his part?  Hell-to-the-no!  He better be paying ALL of it and then some.  You better be living like a queen for having to deal with all of his shenanigans.

I’m tired of these men.

I’m tired of these women.

I’m tired of the media coverage.  The gossip blogs going back and forth about who’s with who now.  It’s all…very…underwhelming.

I’m waiting for the day when women stop fighting over men like their prizes to be won or keep having children like their pawns on a chessboard.  I’m waiting for the day when women post more positivity than negativity on their pages, when they comment with love instead of hate, and when they stop looking at each other as competition, but as allies.  Imagine what we could do if ALL women teamed up?  I mean, seriously?

Don’t you think that it’s man’s design that we be at each other’s throats all the time, fighting over petty things that don’t matter?  Maybe they know what we haven’t come to realize yet.  Maybe they know that if for once we stopped fighting and starting supporting one another…that….wow…we would rule the world.

“We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller. We say to girls, you can have ambition, but not too much. You should aim to be successful, but not too successful. Otherwise, you would threaten the man. Because I am female, I am expected to aspire to marriage. I am expected to make my life choices, always keeping in mind that marriage is the most important. Now marriage can be a source of joy and love and mutual support but why do we teach girls to aspire to marriage and we don’t teach boys the same? We raise girls to see each other as competitors not for jobs or accomplishments, which I think can be a good thing, but for the attention of men. We teach girls that they cannot be sexual beings in the way that boys are.” Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie “We Should All Be Feminists”



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